Sunday, October 07, 2007
Hollywood's not for me...
Last week I had a long chat with a friend of mine who lives in Turkey, in a small village where I once spent several months of my life exploring bad relationships and good kebabs. Bikinis are worn more frequently over there than they are in drizzly London, and as she was clearly driving when I called, I asked her what she was up to.
"I've just been for a Hollywood"
I searched my memory banks for when I lived over there. A Hollywood? Was it some sort of fast food joint? However good the kebabs were in the tiny village I called home for a while, we used to lust after the guilty pleasures of a McDonalds whenever we hit the big city down the coast. Maybe 'Hollywood' was some sort of home-grown Turkish McDonalds that I had conveniently erased from my memory over the years.
Nope, she was referring to a type of bikini wax. The type where it ALL comes off.
"You should get one - they're great" she said.
I pointed out that I had enjoyed the dubious benefits of an involuntary 'Hollywood' courtesy of chemo for the last five months. And what's more I really had not enjoyed it all that much.
Yes, there is a certain ease of upkeep. And possibly it could be argued to be more hygienic, not that I would like to think I was ever that unhygienic without it. But whatever the benefits are, I could not get used to not having any hair down there. It's been years since I looked like that and the juxtaposition of a 34 year old body with a pubic area that looks pre-pubescent is just too disturbing to put into words.
Now that the hair is no longer just growing back on my head, I no longer have to worry about this. But go get a bikini wax done specially to repeat the whole experience?
No thank you.
at 7:59 pm